After writing a blog post about how I was going to write a book, I knew I would have to keep some level of accountability, otherwise it would be a public, unfulfilled promise.

It took me a few weeks to get the ball rolling, but I am happy to say that I am at the 50-page mark of my memoir. I am starting my story around when the symptoms began, in 2008. 50 pages in, and I am just about at 2012. The first draft will easily be over 100 pages, and that’s before I go back and add in more detail.

The process of writing has been fun, but it has not been easy to relive some of my darker moments. I am currently at the time period (2009-12) when I was not handling my symptoms very well. I have been digging up old emails and notes in order to jog my memory, bringing back events and situations that I’d rather forget. However, if not for these moments, it would not be a book worth reading! I need to share the bad in addition to the good. In order to understand where I am today, it is important to convey to readers where I’ve been on the road to acceptance.

It has been a surreal experience. I am amazed by how quickly my body deteriorated, and how unprepared I was to handle my circumstances when they happened. Now, I have the luxury of hindsight and perspective, but at the time, it was extremely difficult.

All I can say is, I have grown so much in nine years. I wish I could go back and let my younger self know I’d be ok.